Life's a Dance

You know, things don't always go as planned.

One can't possibly plan ahead for everything in life and expect it to go that way.

I'm learning to be okay with that.

        Sometimes, I just get into this mindset where I think, "okay, I've thought out every possible way this could go, I've planned for everything that could possibly happen, there is no POSSIBLE WAY this could not go how I have planned it out." ..... and I am almost immediately proven wrong. Well, not always. In fact, I'm usually pretty good at planning. This is probably one of the reasons it shakes me up so much when something goes other than I had planned it. 

       Why am I blogging about this? I just tried answering a boy who asked me to the dance in a creative way. Emphasis on TRIED. To make a long story short, I'll skip to the climax of him walking in on me still setting it up. Not cool. It worked out, it just didn't run as smooth as I had hoped it would. There were many complications which just continued to increasingly frustrate me over and over again. I'm still frustrated about it to this moment. 

        But, I'm learning to be okay with it. 

There's a song I really like that refers to life as being a dance. 

This is my favorite part of it:

"The longer I live, the more I believe
You do have to give if you want to receive.
There's a time to listen, a time to talk,
And you might have to crawl even after you walk.
I've had sure things blow up in my face.
Seen the long-shot win the race.
Been knocked down by the slamming door.
Picked myself up and came back for more.

Life's a dance you learn as you go,
Sometimes you lead, and sometimes you follow.
Don't worry about what you don't know,
Life's a dance you learn as you go."

I really love this song. It sends a message I'd like to follow. 

I am going to try to be less frustrated with failed plans.

Life is a dance I'm learning as I go.

And there's nothing wrong with that.

I Can Easily Wreck

"I watched them tearing a building down,

A gang of men in a busy town.

With a ho-heave-ho and lusty yell,

They swung a beam and a sidewall fell.

I asked the foreman, “Are these men skilled,

As the men you’d hire if you had to build?”

He gave me a laugh and said, “No indeed!

Just common labor is all I need.

I can easily wreck in a day or two

What builders have taken a year to do.”

And I tho’t to myself as I went my way,

Which of these two roles have I tried to play?

Am I a builder who works with care,

Measuring life by the rule and square?

Am I shaping my deeds by a well-made plan,

Patiently doing the best I can?

Or am I a wrecker who walks the town,

Content with the labor of tearing down?"

Are you a builder, or a wrecker? 

"I can easily wreck in a day or two what builders have taken a year to do." 

How powerful a statement. 

              At times, we don't really think about what we are doing or saying, or about the impact we have. We assume that one word here, and one word there, can't really be such a terrible thing. Do not think you are this powerless. Never underestimate the power of a kind word. Or your ability to destroy thousands of them with one unkind word. Turn from harmful words, to helpful words. Do all you can to be the best you can for others. "Men are that they might have joy." Who are you to take that away from someone? Who are they to take it away from you? Think about the times when you needed help, and how much one kind thought could lift you up. Think about those who need your help the most. Yes, it can be tiring to constantly build someone up who has a hard time accepting your encouragement, it can be hard to build anyone up. But you may not know how much it means to them, until you stop. Be a builder, who can, brick by brick, help someone reach their full potential. 

Wouldn't you want someone to do it for you?

Police at my Party

It has been quite the week.

Since last sunday, I've gone to bed between the times of 1 and 3 a.m. every night.

This equals a very sleep-deprived Jessica. 

            It was completely worth it because of the Scarlet Pimpernel. This was the first musical I have really ever been in, and it was AMAZING. I'm not even kidding you, it was great. From my one solo line, to my one spoken line, to all my ensemble numbers, to holding my arms in the air for five minutes, it was incredible. It was an amazing musical put on by amazing people. 

Now to my point.

I was having a really crappy day Friday. 

          As I said before, I was running on hardly any sleep. By second hour, everything just bubbled over and I started to have a breakdown. Emphasis on started, because I didn't let it completely happen. Anyway, by show time I was alright and excited to do our last performance and it was GLORIOUS. The crowd was laughing at everything and we were all amazing. Then, it was cast party time! It was the epitome of a party you would see in a show. We sang at the top of our lungs to Adele, kids tried to put together the cream of 71 Oreos between two cookies, people were drawing permanent marker tattoos on each other, we played Mafia and Curses and Capture the Flag. The police even showed up...

Don't freak out. I kinda did.

        I was in my backyard hiding behind a bush and I see everyone going inside. So, I got up to see what was going on and started heading to my house. A guy standing in my yard shines a bright light at me and asks if I live there. I slowly said yes and got closer to see it was a police officer. Wonderful. He said that since I lived there, he could tell me what was going on. I guess the singing and screaming and someone honking they're horn forever trying to get out of my driveway was too much for a bunch of my neighbors, because he said pretty much the whole neighborhood complained about the noise. 

(If you are one of those, I am incredibly sorry. Really, I am, you have no idea.) 

       So he said everyone needed to get inside or he would start writing tickets. He also informed me that if everyone didn't get their cars out of the road they would start being towed. I guess it turns out I talked with the grouchier police officer, because the one my dad talked to seemed more relaxed about everything. In fact, everyone was relaxed about the whole thing, including my parents. Well, it freaked me out! That will be the first and last time the police will ever to show up at one of my parties. Ever.

       I'm alright though.

I got to stay up until 3 skype-ing with Taylor about my day,

which I hadn't told anyone else about,

     so it was good to get it out. 

      It was a great time.

     Wow.

I Put the Pro in Procrastinator

I should obviously not drink Mountain Dew anymore.

Especially not when I'm trying to stay awake to write a speech.

I'm so ADD right now that I can't even focus on my work.

Hence this short, irrelevant blog post.

I put the pro in procrastinator.

This isn't good.

I worked until 10:30 on a poetry project for English.

Definitely the less-important homework to be done.

I had to make sure it was absolutely A worthy.

This was before I even got the Mountain Dew.

I put the pro in procrastinator.

This isn't good.

I went to my grandparent's for dinner tonight as well.

Of course I'd go with my family to eat dinner there.

I love my grandma and grandpa.

I should have brought my homework along though.

I put the pro in procrastinator.

This isn't good.

I am making this blog post much longer than it really needs to be.

I just changed the screen to homework because I thought my mom was coming.

I didn't want her to see that I was writing a blog post instead of working.

I am ashamed; not enough to go back to work though apparently.

I put the pro in procrastinator.

This isn't good.

Okay, I actually I am ashamed enough to go back to work.

And I know I have to finish this speech for tomorrow.

And the Scarlet Pimpernel is tomorrow.

And I reached five paragraphs, which is a good number.

I put the pro in procrastinator.

This is so bad.

Orange Juice

I just love orange juice.

It's bright, it's happy, 

and it helps you feel better.

Especially when you come home from a long day and find this

Isn't she grand?

650 Paperclips Later...

I made a chandelier.

Out of 650 or so paperclips.

And I'm pretty proud of it.

Why did I make it? Allow me to enlighten you :)

I am currently taking the dreaded Speech class in my school. 

It's dreaded because Mr. Cortes 

"demands perfection"

Seriously, there's a plaque in his room that says that.

            I actually really enjoy it though. As hard as everyone has said it's going to be, I am enjoying it so far. I've learned a lot about myself, listening, communicating, and things as such. I love the class because it is a higher level of thinking. I sit there and literally soak it all in! 

           Anyway, our first speech assignment is called the Shield Speech. In the medieval days, knights would decorate their shields to represent who they were, where they came from, and what they stood for. That's what we're supposed to do for our speech. Create our own shield that represents us, and speak about it in front of the class. I really had a tough time thinking of what to do for me, just because I don't like doing these things for me. Don't get me wrong, I love finding out more about myself because it helps me grow as a person, it's when I have to talk/display myself for other people that I don't enjoy it so much... But anyway, I finally decided I would make myself into a chandelier.

I have three points: 

a chandelier takes in light and provides it for others, 

is made up of many different parts, 

and is beautiful despite it's imperfections.

          A chandelier's purpose is to light up a room, and even when the chandelier isn't on, it reflects the light around it. It doesn't stop light, it lets it freely flow through it's crystal pieces. In my life, I try to always soak in the light and bring it to others around me. I want people to feel light and find light in my presence. I want people to bring people joy.

         It's all of the different parts that make up a chandelier, and it's all the different things about me that make me who I am. I am a whole lot of things, hence my earlier post about I Am, so I won't list a whole lot of them. Though the individual pieces are interesting, it's all the pieces put together that make a chandelier what it is. Same with me.

         And lastly, a chandelier is beautiful despite its imperfections. It doesn't have it's own light, it has to get it from a bigger power source. I get my light from my bigger power source: the gospel. Also, a chandelier's bulb can burn out. Likewise, I can get sick and tired and run down. But the good news is that when the light bulb gets burned out, you can replace (or in my case, recharge) it and the bigger power source is still there.  

These are the things I believe make me like a chandelier.

Here's to hoping my speech goes well.

Opportunities

 I truly believe opportunities are constantly surrounding us. Always. It's whether or not we see them there; and if we do see them there, whether or not we take them.

Topsy Turvy Broadway was one of the biggest opportunities I've had in my high school career.

 It wasn't the first time I've done an unpublished show, or the first time I've written something for a show, 

(that was Emotionography last year), but it was full of a lot of firsts for me:

It was the first time I directed something.

It was the first time I choreographed something.

It was the first time I rewrote a song for a show.

It was the first time I somewhat casted something.

It was the first time I wasn't completely prepared.

And, it was the first time I've ever sang in a show.

And now that it's said and done, I can't help but think of how amazing it was.

It's really a fun thing to think about how much I was able to do because of this show. I mean, how many other people can say that a parody they rewrote with somebody actually became a number in a show?

How many people can say they choreographed a dance in said show that actually made people laugh?

Not many, I'll tell you that. At least, not many high school kids anyway.

I'm lucky.

But then again, it isn't all luck. It was opportunity. Because of amazing people in my life, I had the opportunity to do this amazing show, an opportunity I would have forever regretted not taking.

My next big opportunity = directing a show. And I'm taking it.