December 2, 2012

A Goal Well Reached.


The Troyplayers just got back from Drama State.
Out of roughly 25 schools, we took 8th.
That's pretty good. 
Personally, I just wanted to do better than I had in the past, 
to know that I had made progress over the years.
My goal was improvement.
  • 1st year: I went to districts in ensemble humorous and solo audition, but didn't qualify for state. However, I hitched a ride with a group who had a girl drop out the day before. As a group, we made it to semi-finals, but it wasn't because of me. So, my first year, I didn't even qualify for state.
  • 2nd year: I went to districts in ensemble humorous and solo humorous, and qualified for state in both of them. I was very excited. However, I didn't make it to semi-finals with either of them at state, but I had at least improved from the year before.
  • 3rd year: This year, I went to districts in ensemble humorous, solo serious, and technical props. Let me tell you how I did:
       I made it to state in all three of them. Very exciting, especially considering the fact that I memorized my solo serious the day before, and my first round was the first time I ever performed it at all. I was ecstatic to be going in all three of my events; that's a big accomplishment. However, my main goal became making it to semi-finals. If I could just make it to semi-finals, I would have improved on my acting every year. 
            At state, ensemble rounds and technical props were scheduled for the same time, so I became one of those kids who was double-entered. This meant I would need to go first in one of my rounds, leave, and go last in my other round. However, you only do tech rounds once, then find out if you make it to finals. So, for my first round, I went and performed my ensemble, then had to leave to present my prop. I'd only have to do it again if our prop made it to finals. 


              After doing our first few rounds on Friday, most of the students went back to the hotel to get some sleep. However, some friends, my partner, and I stayed behind to wait for them to post tech finals. Around 11:15, they finally posted. As cool as our prop was, our presentation wasn't all that great. I didn't think we would make it. In fact, we had gone overtime; maximum time was eight and our coach informed us that we had gone on about twelve. All three judges had to drop us down a rank on their ballots. Even dropped down a rank, we still made it to finals. I was excited, but it just didn't feel real, and I didn't feel like that counted as reaching my goal. 
              Saturday, we just had one round left to perform, and I ended up having to use my little double-entered card again. It was stressful but fun having to do my ensemble quickly so I could get back to present my prop. Standing in the gym getting ready for the judges to come over, it still didn't feel real. It still didn't feel like a finals round. The good thing about that was that I wasn't nervous. And when my partner and I were all done presenting, we overheard the judges checking the times they got with each other. All of them had around the six minute mark. Savannah and I just looked at each other. Our final round presentation had gone amazing. We had never even rehearsed it together, but it honestly was an incredible presentation. We picked the right round to do well in.
           At this point, it became waiting time. We wouldn't know how we did with our prop until awards ceremony at the end. The next posting would be of ensemble semi-finals. Honestly, Jessica and I didn't think we would make it through. Not that we were bad, we actually both thought we performed incredibly well. We just knew that there were many good humorous ensembles, and accepted the fact that we probably wouldn't make it. We were glad to just have made it to state. It was Jessica's first year, and she was incredible. You can imagine how astonished we were when we made it to semi-finals.

I did it. I reached my goal.

               From that point on, I didn't really care what happened. Not that I wouldn't do my best and still try to win, just that I would be content with whatever happened from that point. My solo serious didn't make it to semi-finals, but that didn't matter to me. It wasn't very good at all; being serious is not my thing, but I was glad for the experience. Our ensemble didn't make it to finals either, but we weren't upset. We were both proud of ourselves for getting that far at all. 
               After lots of waiting, awards ceremony finally came around. Technical Properties were up on stage second, and I finally got to walk up on that stage and get a finalist ribbon that I had watched so many other students receive in the past. I was happy. Savannah and I stood on that stage side by side and listened as they called out the winners. They called third place, and it wasn't us. They called second place, and it was. We both stepped forward in awe. Ms. Ludlow handed us our medals, and all I could do was look at it. I did it. I finally got my medal in drama competition. I always thought it would be nice to get a medal, but I never thought I'd actually get one.


Quite an accomplishment, if I do say so myself.

           Now, I'm gonna be honest here on all the different emotions that were running through me. First, I hadn't been feeling all too well when I first woke up that morning. Then, I had been bummed out about one of our musical ensemble groups not making to semi-finals. Lastly, I had lost my phone. So, prior to going up on stage, I was not in the best mood. I was happy to have won second, but because I had been in this bad mood, I had a lot of different thoughts run through my head as I sat in those seats.
          First off, I was really upset with the person we had lost to. Not that I thought we should have gotten first, but that everyone in props had lost to this guy. When I found out about this certain information, I'll admit I was a little ticked off that this guy got first. It turns out that this same boy had won first last year with the exact same prop. However, he was able to bring it back this year because he presented it from a different show. How lame is that? Extremely.
          Second off, there were many other pieces that won first in their categories that I didn't think deserved it. It wasn't that I thought I should have won first in my categories, but I was angry that these kids did. Both in Solo Serious and Ensemble Humorous, I was angry at the first place winners. I had seen their pieces, and I had seen other pieces that were ten times better in both my opinion and other's opinions. I was pretty upset that these kids who won first didn't deserve it. 

But what can you do?
Nothing.

          So I'm over it. It may not have been fair in my opinion, but when is life ever fair? Plus, this is all just in my opinion. Apparently all of the judges opinions were different, and it's their opinions that count, not mine. Out of all these things though, there was one thing that was weighing pretty heavily on my mind: the fact that I had won 2nd place props with a prop I didn't even help build.
          I know I helped with the presenting of it, but I didn't actually help make the prop I was presenting. I felt pretty lame. I basically won a medal for being able to talk well. Which is kind of dumb because I hadn't even prepared that presentation at all. There were other kids there that had put in a lot of work on their props, and a lot of time into their presentation, and I just gathered all my stuff up the day before and winged it. I'm glad we won it for Savannah, though, because she really did put in a lot of time and effort. She really did deserve to win it. I was very glad that we won second for her, I just didn't feel like I deserved it all.
         And so, on top of all the other things that had happened, I felt pretty bad for winning a medal I really didn't even deserve. Now, I know this is sounding like a really negative blog post, but state wasn't a negative experience for me. I really had a lot of fun, being there with all my friends and competing one more time. It was actually the most fun I've had at state, because I wasn't nervous at all. I had worked on my pieces (other than prop) more than I ever had in the past, and I actually felt prepared. I was able to do my pieces and have fun with them rather than being worried. And I got to spend a lot of time just being with everybody. It really was fun. I even found my phone. I can proudly say, even though it's just a day later, that state was incredibly fun and the most fun I've ever had at competition even with the ups and downs. 

And you know what else I decided?
I do deserve that medal.

I deserve that medal for competing three years in drama competition, 
showing improvement every single year, 
and not giving up.

I deserve that medal for a goal well reached.